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15-Dec-2017 09:12

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I’d go out with you, but I’d be afraid of my future children inheriting your nose.

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Breaking up with someone you no longer want to date can feel just as awkward.You write a straight-from-the-heart post on your blog and find no one comments. And only write what you love.” —Anita Diamant “If you’re not failing now and again, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything very innovative.” —Woody Allen “Failure is success if we learn from it.” —Malcolm Forbes “A good many young writers make the mistake of including a stamped, self-addressed envelope, big enough for the manuscript to come back in. “I discovered that rejections are not altogether a bad thing. I don’t think that’s a great idea, what with my infectious mouth disease and all… I suffer from somnambulism, so if I go home with you I might end up raiding your fridge and eating all your leftovers in the middle of the night. Sorry, but my mom is really set on me marrying someone who’s Greek Orthodox. This feels like the beginning of a really great friendship! I’d love a drink, as long as you’re not under the impression that offering me one will entice me to hook up with you later. My pet goldfish just passed away, so this really isn’t a great time for me to be seeing anyone. It’s nice; being around you is just like being around my brother! I’d probably be more into this if the pregnancy test I took this morning hadn’t been positive.

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Nope, sorry, still can’t hear you––my right ear isn’t that great either. I’d totally give you my number, but I’m not sure my girlfriend would be thrilled about it. I’d love to get dinner with you, but I’m a gluten-free, dairy-free, egg-free vegan who’s allergic to shellfish and nuts, so my options are pretty limited.

She diveth not, she leapeth not from the pier; but by gentle shocks and cries of protest she entereth slowly; yet when the waters of love encompass her, then she is supported.



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When Alberta Health Services suggested an outbreak in sexually transmitted diseases can be blamed on so-called hookup apps, it was only repeating claims made recently by health officials in other jurisdictions. British health officials have also blamed these apps for increasing the rates of infection. The figure labelled "Tinder" faces "chlamydia," and "Grindr" faces "gonorrhea." Tinder sent a cease and desist letter to the organization, but they settled their feud after the app added a feature to locate sexually transmitted disease clinics.… continue reading »


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